Hello, I blog!
I share all my sporadic and toilet thoughts in here, because I am random like that.
How to stop a kid from crying
Just imagine you’re in a public place. Doesn’t matter if the place is quiet or noisy to begin with. Nearby, you spot a couple with a really young child no more than three years old. For some reason or another, the kid suddenly starts bawling at the top of his/her little lungs while the parents struggle to control the kid (but in vain).
Grarrr, when will the kid just shut the fuck up already? Most of us would think.
Well, one of my best friends has this theory of how to get kids to quieten down. Kids often yell, scream and cry for attention. Positive attention, she says. They want to be mollycoddled by the parents, and basically have the parents fall to their knees coaxing the life out of them just to get them to stop crying.
And when the parents actually give in, they are reinforcing the behaviour. In future, the kids will resort to making one hell of a noise to get what they want because … well, it worked before, didn’t it?
So, she says, what if we gave them attention that is contrary to what they want instead?
She continues. The next time you see a kid crying, look in their generation, point and laugh. She assured me that so far, this has had a 100% success rate for her.
This evening, I decided to put her theory to the test.
While queuing at a restaurant, this kiddo standing nearby suddenly began bawling loudly. The mayhem lasted for a good two minutes and showed no signs of slowing down. The younger cousin and I were trying our darnedest best to hold a decent conversation but it was hard when every sentence was punctuated with an even louder wail.
In a mixture of exasperation and bemusement, I decided to share my friend’s theory to the younger cousin.
“So you see, my friend has this theory. Next time, when you see some kid crying somewhere and the parents can’t seem to calm them down, you should just start laughing at the kid.”
That was when I did a live demonstration – on that kid.
Imagine me looking straight into the kiddo’s eyes and laughing. Not a loud, MUAHAHA kind of laugh – but a slightly muted version of that. Well, I was trying this for the first time, so I wasn’t quite sure about err … how the parents will take to it.
And damn, it worked.
The kid clammed up instantly and looked straight at me. Big wide, innocent eyes. As if wondering “waiiiiiiii is this girl laughing at me?”
And it was back to blissful silence.
Awesome. My friend is such a genius.
Caveat: I doubt the parents were very pleased, though – because the kid’s dad was constantly shooting me disapproving looks after that. In response, I returned him a look that was meant to say well, it seems like I can control your kid better than you. (;
Cousins united (among the din of kids)
Gee, it’s been such a long time since the four of us took a proper photo together. (Okay, I lied. Our last photo had been early this year – but this is the first one in a long time where all of us look decent.)
Sticking together since young – the awesome foursome.
Clockwise from top left: David, me, Jeremiah, Matthias.
I look really tiny here.
The above was taken during a double celebration within my extended family – my uncle’s birthday, and the 1st birthday of his second grandson.
As usual, I came face to face with so many people I didn’t know. But then again, since when do we attend a large family gathering and not find any faces we don’t recognize?
Apart from the usual members of my extended family who meet on a regular basis – there were vast amounts of people from what I call, “the other extended family” – namely, the extended family of my cousin’s wife.
Kids, kids, everywhere
Boy, “the other extended family” really did know how to reproduce! Look at all the KIDS.
They ran around the living room, screaming their lungs out, shoving toy guns and all sorts of thingamajigs all over the place. They fought over balloons. They pushed each other. They threw themselves on the floor and kicked and screamed.
One kid crawled under my legs while I was seated – which made me jump up and yelp.
And another stepped on Jeremiah’s foot – which was recuperating in a huge cast after a recent operation. (Props to him for not jumping and yelping, though.)
And boy. Not only are they rowdy kids – they’re a bunch of smart alec rowdy kids.
There was one occasion where I shouted (to make myself heard over the din) at them to play outside the house instead of around the living room where plates and cups are precariously stacked, and the adults struggling to watch television.
The response I got?
“YOU WANT US TO PLAY ON THE ROAD AND GET KNOCKED DOWN AND DIE, IS IT?”
– Kid in the orange sleeveless tee.
?!?!?!
Pfffffft, never heard of the garden and the backyard, is it?
More babies on the way?
I received news that a cousin (J) is expecting her second child. (Which makes the fifth kiddo from the fourth generation on the way.) I’ve another expecting cousin as well – although I’ve learnt of her pregnancy much, much earlier.
And it seems that my reactions towards each pregnancy are becoming more and more varied.
Eight years ago, when I received news that my first nephew is on his way, my response was an enthusiastic “Oh my gosh, that’s fantastic!”
Two years ago, upon learning about my upcoming second nephew, my response was a mere “Mmmmmph!”
Last year, when I learnt that the third nephew was coming along, my response was a sharp squeak – “Another boy?!?”
A couple of months ago when I learnt that another cousin is pregnant with her second child (in two years), I reacted with a … “WHAT?!? You mean they’re so bored they have no other form of entertainment at night?!?”
And after tonight’s news? I leaned towards my mum and whispered “Whose condom broke?” Needless to say, my speechless mum couldn’t garner any response.
Later on, J confessed that she decided to have a second child because Little Joshua (her first child, now seven years old) wanted her to.
I immediately had mental images of Little Joshua approaching both parents and asking – “Mummy, Daddy! Can you two have sex? Pleeeeeease?” and couldn’t stop cracking up after that. Hehehehe.
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