Just when you thought it was safe to go to the toilet.
Yes, that girl in the comic strip is supposed to be me. ;)
Don’t you just hate it when this happens? You’re on a particularly smooth flight and you decide to go to the toilet. Then Mister Turbulence suddenly emerges out of nowhere to rattle the plane while you struggle to balance in a little cubicle.
You decide to pee as fast as you can and dash back to your seat.
No sooner after your bottom comes in contact with your seat, the turbulence suddenly … stops.
(And I think I should draw more comic strips like these.)
I don’t usually care when emails arrive in my school inbox since most of them turn out to be intra-school spam anyway (e.g. co-curricular groups promoting their events, day-to-day preaching by the higher school management and yadda yadda.)
This particular email was a from a group which called SMU Peerhelpers.
Somehow, I decided to pay attention to this one because … I don’t really know, actually.
Maybe because there was just something so blatantly wrong about their subject line? Something just looked strange, but I couldn’t place my finger immediately on exactly what. It only struck me after a few seconds.
Take a look for yourself.
All of a sudden, SMU Peerhelpers has transformed into SMU Peehelpers.
Have you seen a doctor for your bladder problems today? Bladder stones blocking the path of your usual steady stream of pee? Having problems preventing yourself from pee-ing all over the sidewalk? Maybe the pee helpers can help.
Quite a bit of hoo-ha has been going on at my school about this security guard.
Let’s call her Curly – because of her err … curly hair.
Of all the buildings she had to be assigned too, we were unfortunate enough to have her assigned to the Information Systems building … and having to bear with her crap too.
She shouts and screams at students for no apparent reason, barges into group study rooms when she sees a boy and a girl studying or working on a project together (and seated far apart, may I add) and accusing them of involving in hanky panky (WTF?!?). To make things worse, she is rude to all the professors, the VIPs who visit our school … and even to our dean.
Well, what made things slightly bearable was the presence of another Indian security guard (who has been around far longer than Curly did) at our building. She’s really nice, and is generally well-liked by everyone in the school.
And for the record, she can’t stand Curly as well. How she survives working on her daily 12-hour shifts is completely beyond me.
Anyway, Curly went missing for the past week or so from our building and it was rejoice galore. Rumours were going around about her being fired, having been transferred out or having dropped dead due to excessive shouting (?!?).
And the littl’uns who have lost their student passes needn’t fear entering the building via the main gantries (since they can easily stroll through the visitor’s gantry without fear of being yelled at) … at least for the past few days.
I’ve spotted Curly at the school’s administration building towards the end of last week, which somewhat solved the mystery of where she went. Somehow, she had been transferred there – which I learnt later, was due to excessive complaints from the Information Systems student and faculty community who couldn’t tolerate her nonsense any further.
Well, the administration block suited her – I feel.
She can terrorize all the admin staff there and they wouldn’t give a hoot since they get a kick out of terrorizing us students anyway.
And yes, that’s the background story.
A coupla’ buddies and myself were on our way to our good ol’ Information Systems block this afternoon when the topic of Curly came up – and they filled me in on the details I had apparently missed out on.
Basically, the other two security guards who handled the afternoon shifts with Curly at the administration block couldn’t stand her either and they had requested for her to be transferred elsewhere again.
Since the higher authorities had no other place to thrust Curly upon, they had kindly asked our remaining friendly Indian security guard as to whether Curly could resume her duties at the Information Systems block. For obvious reasons, our Indian security guard said ‘no’.
To conclude, the latest update we’ve heard as of this afternoon was that Curly will be banished from the school entirely, forever and ever amen.
Needless to say, we were in pretty high spirits as we approached the main entrance of our school …
… until we saw Curly standing by the gantries.
With her trademark crossed-arm (think Sir Stamford Raffles) pose.
With her stern, non-smiling face.
And with … that curly hair we’ve learnt to spot from a distance. (It’s become a conditioned reflex to dodge each time we see that hair anywhere.)
Immediately, the three of us turned to each other and yelped: “WHAT THE FUCK IS SHE DOING BACK HERE?!?”
Ladies and gentlemen, to be continued.