I wrote a post about how IV sedation benefited me during a dental procedure back in 2010, which subsequently led to several emails from fellow dental anxiety sufferers wanting to know more. Thank you guys for writing in, and I hope you managed to get your dental woes sorted out sans the anxiety! I guess this will be a sequel. Kind of.
Warning – super long post ahead!
I hate sequels, especially of the dental drama variety. Holiday sequels, family comedy sequels, “funny moments in the office” sequels, yeap bring them on. But medical sequels (too much of them) and dental sequels can well stay out of my way. But that’s life – full of ups and downs.
Unfortunately, a filling on my right upper molar failed miserably. I currently have pain on chewing, and considering the depth of the cavity, I opted to do an elective root canal treatment with the blessings of my current dentist. (And another crown thereafter. Yes, another.)
And of course, with me being all jittery about dental procedures, I opted to be sedated once again.
With my medical history being too complex now, my dentist didn’t feel too comfortable doing the root canal himself. So he referred me to an endodontic specialist whom I saw for the first time last week.
The endodontist was a really nice guy, and I really enjoyed chatting with him. And me being me, I flooded him with loads of questions. But not once did he show any sign of irritation. It was only when he wanted to do an “ice test” (putting a cold object on my tooth to test the level of nerve sensitivity) on my tooth did I freak out. It was then followed by my howls of “ohmygosh, so embarassing!” thereafter, with the endodontist and his assistant smiling reassuringly at me.
He then asked me why was I so anxious about dental work and where my dental anxiety originated from. Not the first dentist to ever ask me this question. To be honest, I never really thought about it, and my responses to previous dentists had always been a shrug. I only knew that yeah, I get anxious about dental work.
I thought about it a little on the spot, but was only able to vaguely trace it to my experience with my primary school dentist.
My response to him? “Because my primary school dentist was a prick.”
He could barely hold back his chuckle.
I forgot to pay my hosting bill.
I had this sudden urge today to take a peek at my blog. No idea where the urge came from. I was just lying in bed and reading a book and suddenly, I just reached for my phone and navigated here. (How random, I know.)
And realized it was kaput.
And I totally flipped.
The error page stated “suspended account”. And being the technical person I am, thoughts such as “DID SOMEONE BREAK INTO MY ACCOUNT TO SEND SPAM?!” were racing through my mind.
Only when I logged into my billing account and saw warnings everywhere along the lines of “O$P$” (“owe money, pay money”, for the uninitiated) did I realize my boo-boo.
Funnily though, I did login to my billing account to update my credit card details when I received the payment notification.
Only that I entered the details wrong.
Then forgot all about it, thinking it’d auto-renew as it should.
Which it didn’t.
I am getting absent-minded. Sorry guys. If anyone’s still reading and thought that I had decided to just let this blog die, I’m still alive and so is my site. I’ve been doing this since 2001 and no matter how unmotivated I am to write these days, I will never ever (like, EVER) let this site die.
It was part of my teenhood, and then my young adulthood. Those years of me glued to my computer designing layout after layout back in the 2000s (which I don’t do anymore). Posts may have dwindled but this place still holds memories.
So, phew. Welcome back, my dear site.
And thank you, Hostgator for not deleting my stuff even though I owed you money. You just saved me from a re-uploading nightmare.
Was just reading an article today about an entrepreneur whom in an interview, mentioned he only needed 4 hours of sleep at night because there’s so much to do.
Not linking to that article because that would personally identify said entrepreneur (whose success story and company happens to be one I respect a lot).
My response to that article was to grit my teeth down and think “so young, so foolish.”
With all due respect to entrepreneurs, there need to be fewer articles sensationalizing about how people survive without sleep (or on very little sleep) to achieve success, like as if it’s a badge of pride or something.
I used to be that foolish person. I stayed awake for 48 hours on several occasions back in my heyday – whether to complete projects as a student or to hit a deadline. And then boast happily about it as if I’m so proud of that fact.
Then again, I was a young person who had my life ahead of me. Or so I thought.
5 years and several illnesses later, this late twenty-something has realized that health is not something that is a given. It is a privilege that can be taken away anytime.
And I’m struggling to get it back. Struggling, because what I have now is irreversible and life is now pretty much a “fight to live normally”.
I no longer consider myself an entrepreneur, even though I’m in the founding team of a startup company. My priorities have completely shifted and my health has taken centrestage. You would say that all the fire has gone out of me, and I wouldn’t disagree with you.
Then again, I’m in an extreme situation so I cannot help tutting when reading about how people put their health on the line just to achieve success. Like heyyy, you guys still have your health. Can you please take better care of it?
Youth does not make one immune to the shit that can happen if you take health for granted.
I know everyone defines success differently and for some, their business/work is their life (like it used to be for me). But nothing is worth throwing your health away for.
Please don’t learn the hard way like me, yeah.
/End of my Saturday night random thoughts.
This blog has really bad continuity, I know. It’s September now – 6 months since my last post and unfortunately, 2015 is pretty much like 2014 – defined by the same health struggle, multiple hospitalizations and less than 50% attendance in the office.
I have so many insecurities now, but I’ll save that for a different post on a different day. If I get round to it, that is.
Typing is actually painful so I guess I’ll stop here.
Good night, folks.